Tips for homeschooled students who want to rebel
by Israel Wayne
1. Unbutton your top button.
2. Watch a DVD that isn’t produced by Steve Demme or Andrew Pudewa.
3. Play your “Patch the Pirate” and Buddy Davis albums backwards.
4. Ride on a Greyhound at some point, so you can claim you “rode the bus,” like everyone else.
5. Talk to someone your own age.
6. Do schoolwork in regular clothes (to show that you aren’t like all the other homeschoolers who do school in their pajamas).
7. Do something besides reading a book.
8. Ride the zip-line at the Creation Museum so your friends who went to Six Flags will be jealous.
9. End every sentence by saying, “gnarley dude!” so people will know you are “with it.”
10. Walk ten feet in front of your mom and dad, and nine siblings, so no one at Walmart will know you are related (even though your clothes match all of theirs).
(And don’t let your parents see this post!) 😉